The 90 day rule

Ok, we have all heard of THE RULES and the more popular book HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU. These books offer nothing but the absolute WORST dating advice ever. I, the incredibly talented, strong, confident woman that I am, will admit to reading them, and in some cases even following these "rules," and totally ruined some of the best relationships that I could have potentially been involved in. You know girls, sometimes, it just happens, you sleep with a man, and he doesn't call. But us broads are actually, sometimes, just as guilty of being the relationship terminator. And believe it or not, I think, gentlemen, may actually have feelings too. Sometimes, I, in fact, don't know who stopped calling who after a passionate love fest.

SIDE BAR: I don't actually call men, EVER, not because this is one of "THE RULES" that I actually always abid by, but because, I hate talking on the phone.

The point here is, perhaps, in some cases, I was actually responsible for being the post sex quiter. Women are allowed to be the "one night stand" shot caller. Sometimes, we don't have to wait to have sex with a man. If he is indeed worth our time, he will want to call after sex. If not, oh well, another one bites the dust. My question here is this, why is that we women think that it's not ok to "sleep around?"

I know, you fellas out there are thinking, HELL YEA, preach it girl. But this is not about you. That's what the lovely ladies' problem is: we can't do something completely satisfying for ourselves. If we do, we are not only judged by YOU fellas, but we are also judged by our peers, the women that are suppose to stand beside us, walk with us, understand us, and most importantly the people in our lives that can only make us stronger.

So, my point... A very close girlfriend of mine pointed out that she doesn't sleep with a man until 90 days has passed. My thoughts, at first, WOW, this girl has got it right. But after having the chance to process this thought, I realized, that this is the exact attitude that continuously makes us secrataries rather than, presidents. We can not continue to look at ourselves as someone who has to "play the game" in order to get them to like us. Wake up gals, it's not about THEM, it is indeed, ABOUT US.